Posts Tagged With: wine

Spinning The ChocolatRouge


Childhood games… Freeze Tag. Hide and Seek. Ding, Dong Ditch’em. B-B Britches. I’ve played them all and I have fond memories of all the neighborhood friends and classmates who joined in. However, I can’t say that I remember playing Spin The Bottle a lot when I was younger. I’m not sure why. Maybe it just wasn’t popular among the crowd I hung out with. I know that it involved kissing the person at whom the bottle pointed. That could be both good and bad. But I think for some of the teenagers, kissing seemed… boring? lol

The game that was played most often at high school parties that I attended was Truth or Dare. These games were particularly interesting when those involved included people who secretly liked someone else in the group, or as an excuse for established couples to make out in public. There was the occasional dare that caused jealousy to rear it’s ugly head when a girl kissed (among other things) a guy who was another girl’s boyfriend or vice versa. But for the most part, it was all in good, albeit somewhat risque, fun.

A friend recently reminded me of the game of Spin The Bottle and it got me to wondering… I know how crazy my friends and I were as kids, but I wonder how different the game would be to play as an adult? Hmm… there goes that vivid imagination of mine (I mentioned to someone that it’s one of my super powers ). So last night, after all the kids were in bed, I downed the last remaining drops of this delicious bottle…

Since the bottle was now empty (which it should be if you’re going to use it), I was encouraged to spin it… and I did. When it finally stopped, it was pointing at the refrigerator. So, I looked inside and as one is obligated to do, kissed a strawberry. smooch

Have you ever played Spin The Bottle or any other kissing games?

Categories: personal, stories | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

DOVE NOTE #19: Like Fine Wine


(from the forthcoming book “Dove Notes “)

Like fine wine, some things only get better with time…

I like talking about my wife. Mostly because I’m hopelessly in love with her, and my interactions with her provide ongoing fodder for, among other things, my blog and my book.  But I’ve had people ask me, “What do you mean when you say you’re hopelessly in love with her?” Oh, well let me explain…

Being hopelessly in love means that there is no hope for my love for her ever changing.  She’s got my heart sewn up and it’s safely tucked away in her care. She and I work very hard to define our relationship as one that gets better as the days go by. We actively pursue peace through honest assessment and vulnerability. She knows the areas where I fall down and helps me get back up again.

We believe that success includes being able to own your mistakes. When you make excuses for something you’ve done, whether or not it was intentional, you rob yourself  and your partner of the opportunity to work together to modify future behavior and prevent it from happening again. Accountability also allows you to celebrate your accomplishments together. If I’ve overcome a paralyzing fear of public speaking through her encouragement, support and nudging, it becomes a victory not only for me, but for her as well. Being transparent with someone is not a simple thing to do, but it is possible and the rewards are endless. Better communication. Better understanding of our needs. Better intimacy. The list goes on…

In many relationships, it’s not enough to be intelligent, beautiful, outgoing or talented. Nope. Those things are great. But what matters most of all is personality and character compatibility. See, you can have two relatively nice people who both enjoy music and dancing. But life experience, coupled with how they were raised… whether or not they have siblings… how they get along with their parents… and personal temptations (money, alcohol, attention, etc) can all have an adverse affect. One person’s tendencies can push another person’s buttons.

For example, let’s say a guy grew up in a family that consistently avoided conflict by ignoring the obvious elephant in the room. The girl comes from a family that addresses conflict immediately so that it doesn’t fester and become a bigger problem. Put the two of them together and you’ve got a recipe for disaster. While she pushes for communication, he will constantly blow off having an uncomfortable conversation. She feels ignored. He feels pressured. Do they still share the same interests? Sure. Do they find each other attractive? Of course. But unless this issue is dealt with, the relationship becomes unhealthy and eventually unsustainable. It’s another sad case of good people who unfortunately weren’t good together.

It’s all about finding compatibility with someone who is equally committed to creating a healthy relationship. And no, it’s not automatic. It takes time, effort and patience. But the end result is becoming another couple that’s hopelessly in love. 😉

Categories: Dove Note, intimacy, marriage, relationships, Series | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Casualties Of Time


As a society it seems as if we value just about everything as it ages. Things like…

Wine: (Paul Masson “We will sell no wine before its time“) There seems to be a general belief that when it comes to wine, older is definitely better. People have paid out extraordinary amounts of money to own rare and highly sought after spirits.

And houses: Although most houses fall into the “decrepit” category after 100 years (or less in some cases), there are still many houses (even older) that are considered “vintage” and sell for a premium, especially American Craftsman Style homes if they have all or most of their original “built ins” or have been designated historical landmarks.

And of course, baseball cards: The most expensive baseball card in the world right now is one from 1909 that was sold for a staggering $2.8 million!

Now, while I certainly think all of these aged-collectable are nice, the most notable and surprising exception to inclusion in this time-established ranking of seniority… is people.

It’s really sad to me that as people get older, instead of treating them with respect and dignity, many of them are treated like a nuisance. An inconvenience at best. We cast our elderly aside like yesterdays newspaper. Maybe good for recycling, but more likely to be used as lining in bird cages. Where is the honor many of the aged among us so rightfully deserve? When did we become so careless with our ancestry?

I’ve purposed to simply record conversation with my older relatives, especially my parents. I sit and ask questions about a bygone era that shaped the people they eventually became. People who fell in love, got married and gave me life. I realized a long time ago that there is so much to be learned from their lifetime of experiences. I learn about our country’s history from a first-hand accounting of events. I learn about the transformation of what constituted entertainment. And I learn about our community both large and small, as well as its victories and its defeats.

So just remember, by the grace of God, we’ll all get old eventually. Make the time to give your elders the time and attention they deserve. Because the hearts of this extraordinary population, and the wisdom-laden information they provide are in a word… priceless.

Categories: commentary, opinion, personal | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

DOVE NOTE #2: It’s In The Details


(from the forthcoming book “Dove Notes”)

Men like to do things big…

Big trucks,

Big home theater systems,

Big plates of food,

even Big pets…

But in talking with my female friends, one of their chief complaints is that in doing things BIG in the relationship, men often overlook the details. And let me tell you, the details matter.

You can score points by remembering details. But, the opposite is also true. MAJOR points will be deducted for missing important DETAILS.

She will definitely appreciate you planning a romantic dinner for the two of you and making reservations at the most swanky restaurant in town. But what will impress her more?  Have the car washed and detailed before you pick her up… even if the evening is a surprise, inform her of the specific dress code for the night’s events so she won’t be too hot, too cold, over or under dressed for the occasion … remember (and then order) her favorite wine…

DETAILS.

Steal her for a unexpected weekend getaway.  But have all the arrangements made for kids/pets/plant care, pre-pack the suitcase and let her know that if we’ve forgotten anything, you’ve brought extra cash for contingencies.

DETAILS.

Offer to cook dinner. Have dinner ready at a reasonable hour and be mindful of her current health focus/diet plan/eating guide. Make dessert something indicative of your relationship. Pudding cups are UNacceptable.

DETAILS.

I guarantee that the response to your attention to detail will be exponentially more than the effort invested.

Categories: Dove Note, relationships, Series | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

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