(from the forthcoming book “Dove Notes”)
I have realized that for some women, talking on the phone is more than just an exchange of words. It is actually a declaration, in no uncertain terms, about their importance and value. Though unspoken, there are several questions that go through a woman’s mind when she calls you, or while she’s on the phone with you. Some of the key questions are these:
2. If he is busy, will he call me back in the time he told me? (Note: If you say you’ll call her back in 5 minutes, that means 5 minutes. This does not mean 10 minutes, or even 6 minutes. If you are late by more than hour?? DO NOT CALL. Show up with flowers, candy or any other peace offering.)
3. Will he rush me off the phone after 5 minutes of talking. (This is critical. You may not think much of it, but it is considered a major insult.)
4. Is he sincerely listening to me, or is it just a means to an end? (Believe me, they can tell the difference.)
5. Will he stay on the phone until the sun rises, simply because he enjoys talking to me so much? (Oh, you’re tired?? So what! This simply means that you are willing to make sacrifices for her. She needs to know this.)
6. What do we talk about? Him? Me? or Us? (For her, there should be a balance of about 20% him, 40% me, 40% us. This can vary at different times, but you will not lose using this formula)
Phone calls can be critical to relationship stability. Do not take them lightly. If used correctly, they can become mutually beneficial for both of you. Remember, the purpose of the phone call is to connect with each other. Kindling the embers while you are apart, makes it easier to spark the inferno when you’re together.