I remember one night after putting the little ones to bed, my wife and I settled into a relaxed time of snuggling and talking in the bed. We try to do this often because we realize the importance of making time for us to connect on a regular basis. This can be a challenge when your days are full with work, little kids and various other responsibilities. But the rewards are beyond measure.
So imagine my surprise when my always thoughtful wife says, “I’ve been meaning to tell you something. It crossed my mind the other day and I wanted to make sure I told you.”
“Okay,” I said, thinking it was more light pillow talk concerning a holiday gift or planning details for Arielle’s first birthday.
As her eyes began to well up with tears, she said, “I just want you to know that if anything ever happens to me, you are free to remarry. After taking whatever time you need, I want you to be happy.”
This caught me off guard. I wasn’t expecting that… At. All. But I could sense the depth of her love for me. The look in her eyes was very sobering. All I could say at first was, “Okay” which felt so completely inadequate.
“I wouldn’t be alone. I’d have our children with me”, I reassured her.
“Yes, but you told me many years ago that you were meant to be married. And you are. I would never want you to feel bound to loneliness because of my passing”, she said, her hand resting on my cheek. “Just know that I would be happy to know that you found love again.”
I smiled and wiped away a trailing tear, telling her, “I understand. But in this moment… my happiness rests with you.”
I never really thought of this, to be honest. Perhaps I just assumed that she would know that if something happened to me, I’d want her to find love again. But she said that it’s not a given and she wanted it to be very clear for me. Yeah, that’s the kind of woman I married. Remarkable.