You know, I’ve been cruising the blogosphere for the better part of a decade. And I’ve seen a lot of interesting things and I’ve met a lot of interesting people. In all this time, I’ve seen a common thread among certain types of people when it comes to love. They fall into a few distinct categories:
The Skeptic: Many skeptics see LOVE merely as a theory. They often find no practical applications in the real world. To some of them, love is bitterly fleeting and inevitably temporary. They approach relationships with extreme trepidation. Failure becomes the expectation and they tend to project this onto most of their relationships, which can have the unfortunate effect of acting as a self-fulfilling prophecy. For the skeptic, LOVE at most only exists in books and movies where the outcome is predetermined by the author.
The Dreamer: Dreamers for the most part, have a wholly unrealistic perception of LOVE . They’ve bought into the fantasy that LOVE comes in the form of a knight in shining armor riding on a white horse, or a beautiful virgin damsel in distress hoping for a handsome hero. The drawback is that dreamers measure every romantic encounter by an unattainable standard that often leaves them disappointed. No one fits the mold they’ve crafted in their mind about the perfect relationship. It’s almost as if they’ve scripted the entire story in their head to the point that even one diversion from the plan disqualifies even the most promising suitor.
The Realist: These people have usually witnessed the best and worst LOVE has to offer. It isn’t always from direct experience, but more often from observing the roller coaster rides of Skeptics and Dreamers. They have no preconceived notions of what a relationship should look like. They’re not swayed by empty declarations or sappy displays of affection. And they don’t confuse lust with LOVE. Although many Realist would love to experience whimsical romance, they typically are more than willing to put in the work necessary to simply make a relationship successful. This saves them from the disappointment usually experienced by Dreamers and the hardening of the hearts of Skeptics.
Sometimes I wonder how many of us have a realistic outlook on LOVE. I think a lot of people would like to believe that LOVE is just like the movies or in the stories we read where everyone lives happily ever after. After the dissolution of my first marriage, I was a hardcore Skeptic and thought LOVE was a farce. But meeting and marrying Dre has been the next best thing to living the life of a Dreamer.
Do you fit any of these categories?
If not, how would you categorize your outlook on LOVE?
Do you feel as if your perception of LOVE is determined by your life experiences?